After A While, A Feast Of Thanks Giving For You

Before we head out to spend Thanksgiving with my mom, I wanted to share with you a poem she clipped out of the Ft. Lauderdale News and Sun Sentinel and mailed to me when I was a junior in college. Since 1985 this lovely piece has been kept safe in my little brown box of quotes.

After a While

by Veronica A. Shoffstall

After a while you learn
the subtle difference between
holding a hand and chaining a soul
and you learn
that love doesn’t mean leaning
and company doesn’t always mean security.
And you begin to learn
that kisses aren’t contracts
and presents aren’t promises
and you begin to accept your defeats
with your head up and your eyes ahead
with the grace of woman, not the grief of a child
and you learn
to build all your roads on today
because tomorrow’s ground is
too uncertain for plans
and futures have a way of falling down
in mid-flight.
After a while you learn
that even sunshine burns
if you get too much
so you plant your own garden
and decorate your own soul
instead of waiting for someone
to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure
you really are strong
you really do have worth
and you learn
and you learn
with every goodbye, you learn…

On Mush And Elegance: The Brown Box Quotes, An Introduction

My brain has been mush for a month.

Mush.

Yucky, uninspired, dare I say even depressed, mush.

And writing, the process of placing nouns and verbs and maybe even adjectives in some kind of proper, sensible order, has been nearly impossible.

I have let the negativity at work once again seep through me and be fully digested. Once again, I am where I was six months ago. Will I have a job, or won’t I?

And I have learned something from this process of watching a corporate ship be run aground and the mentality of those at this particular helm.

I have learned how those who didn’t are blamed and targeted by those who did.

And I have watched and been affected by those with power using that power to stomp on those who they perceive as not having power.

This saddens me even more than the prospect of losing my job or having my hours cut.

And as I have watched this play of power, I have sadly wondered, will humans ever evolve past our original “eat or be eaten” hard-wiring?

But yesterday, as I was getting ready to go to work, I decided I was not going to let those whose hearts have been hardened, harden my heart.

And I thought about something I had found the day before, something I have held onto for almost three decades and that has delightfully reappeared in my life like a well to a desert wanderer.

My little brown box.

Inside this little box, written in my 19 year-old hand on now yellowing index cards are the words of the masters who have inspired me since I was a college sophomore studying history and literature. Words written by men and women who took life’s pains and delights and created beauty.

Inside this plain, plastic box is elegance and it is from this mucky place I am in and trying to work myself out of that I launch “The Brown Box Quotes” series. They are words that inspire me and keep my heart elastic and I would like to share them with you.

So without further adieu, I begin at the front of the box…

Weekly Photo Challenge: Green

How nice to take a respite from a difficult week and visit the loveliness that are my daughter’s photos and my backyard.

My daughter.

And the little slice of sanity that is my yard of green.

They remind me there is indeed beauty in this crazy, sometimes mean and messed up world.

“It seems very safe to me to be surrounded by green growing things and water.” Barbara Kingsolver

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To fill your world with more beauty visit WordPress’ Weekly Photo Challenge here

When Halloween and Thanksgiving Collide

When my kids were growing up I made a rule that once they were out of elementary school they could no longer go trick-or-treating. It wasn’t my plan to be mean momma, not at all. I just always thought older kids going to their neighbors asking for candy is tacky.

So when middle school rolled around the kids still dressed up, but they stayed home and became the candy giver-outers.

And I was so pleasantly pleased to watch them both accept and embrace becoming the givers.

Ted though, now 21, has ceased being part of door duty. To him the best part of Halloween is November 1st, and going to the grocery store to buy half-priced candy. That’s Ted.

But Meg, my senior in high school, still looks forward to dressing up. So when she asked me if I would sew her a Merida (from the movie Brave) costume for her last Halloween at home, how could I do anything but look back at my Scottish-blooded, award-winning archer, with a head full of curly red hair girl and say anything but YES! Continue reading

Weekly Photo Challenge: Renewal

A veteran of many construction projects, I see the demolition of a job site, with all its inherent mess and chaos, as the first part of the magnificent process of renewal.

Demolition and remodeling to me, is a metaphor for life and spiritual renewal. To grow, to move forward, to get to where we desire to go, we must put forth the effort it takes to tear out that which no longer works and in its place, design and rebuild that which does.

As in the case of my deck, before my backyard can be altered and improved, before it can become what we have always imagined it could be, the old, damaged wood needed to be removed and discarded.

The work is exhausting, and leaves me depleted, but then when I take those first few steps back and look upon what I have just completed, when I can see not what was, but what can be, the fatigue of the effort is forgotten and I am energized.

For more images of Renewal, check out Weekly Photo Challenge here