School is about to start and that means a lot of anxious kids and parents out there. I remember the trepidation that came with the transition from summer to school. So with that in mind, I got out my trusty K-3 notebook and dusted off another Social Story I wrote for Ted when he was about to begin Kindergarten.
Maybe this story can work as a template for you to use to write your own story. And, if you are interested in writing your own, here are a few tips to make the writing even easier…
1. Use specifics unique to your child. Use the names, locations, schedules, etc your child will be exposed to in their day. The idea is for the story to help reduce anxiety by making them feel more familiar with a new situation.
2. Make it age appropriate. Use language and sentence structure similar to your child’s other reading materials. Use larger font for younger kids.
3. Explain simply the whys of the desired behavior, the consequences for not following the behavior, and the actions they can take to help them successfully achieve the desired behavior. Respect is shown to a child when a situation and the expectations of them are explained.
4. Use phrases such as “I will try” rather than “I will”. The “I will” command is stressful because it allows the child no room to error. Remember, this is a learning tool and mistakes will be made.
5. Provide acceptable options for your child to take when faced with challenging situations. “When I feel stressed I can squeeze my ball.” Or, “When one of my classmates calls me a name I can ignore and walk away.” Options are empowering.
6. Keep the social story as short as possible and focused on one specific topic. If your child is nervous about what will happen during the day, get a copy of the schedule and write a story that describes it. If you try to teach more than one topic in a story it will be confusing and less effective.
7. Try to read the story at a consistent time and when the child is relaxed and open to instruction. We tried to read a story at bedtime for up to a week. As soon as Teddy showed resistance we discontinued reading it.
The following story was written to familiarize Teddy to his new Kindergarten class rules…
Behaving In My Class
I am a big kid and I go to Kindergarten. In addition to learning reading, science and math I am also learning how to behave in my classroom.
To clearly understand how to behave in class, Mrs. Anderson has six rules every student is to follow. They are:
-
Use a quiet voice
-
Be a good listener
-
Follow directions
-
Walk, don’t run, at all times
-
Keep your hands to yourself
-
Be kind
It is very important that I follow these rules. I am a member of a class and I need to try to be a good member.
Mrs. Anderson has made these rules so that everyone is nice to each other and so school is a nice place to go.
When I do not follow the rules, if I am not being nice, I will get in trouble and I do not get a Smile Dollar.
Mrs. Anderson, mom and dad are sad when I don’t follow the rules. They want to see me try hard to be a good member of my class.
If I am having problems following a rule I can ask Mrs. Anderson for help. She is my teacher and is there to help me learn to do the right thing.
I will try very hard to follow Mrs. Anderson’s rules. Rules are for everyone to follow.
Related Article:
I believe this would be helpful for ALL children to have before school begins again. I also believe it would benefit most adults to adhere to Mrs. Anderson’s rules. Thanks, Mom!
You are welcome, dear.
Slam dunk! This is just what I needed to read today. I have boardmaker and I write social stories for Tyoma, but I missed some important bits that you covered here. Number’s 5 & 6 are especially helpful. Tyoma needs an visible menu of choices to keep him from lashing out.
I think I am going to write a “coming home from school” story for him since he tends to be 99% teeth after a day at school. He keeps it in all day but melts down with glory at home.
Do you have any ideas to help T transition to his home environment more smoothly?
Thank you!
Lori
Hi Lori,
I LOVE the idea of a coming home social story. I was always so concerned about Ted making it through a day of school I accepted whatever happened at home and thus never wrote such a story. But your thought is an excellent one and very, very important.
My initial thoughts…. it would be fantastic for Tyoma to learn to both recognize and accept the pent up frustration he feels from a day of keeping it together at school. It is so important to recognize our feelings so we can improve our chances of acting appropriately. How about a story that explains what is happening to him and then the opportunity to release his pent up energy and frustration as a big part of his transition time from school to home. A “controlled” meltdown, if you will. How about a social story that says something like…
“Silly Time”
“I feel SO (describe feeling with your word) when I get home. All day I have worked hard to listen to my teacher and follow the class rules … I get tired after all this work…. so when I get home I get to set a timer and go to my room (or place of your preference) and do WHATEVER I want… this is my “Silly Time”… I can (fill in activities he can use to work off steam) scream… I can kick my pillow… I can bang on a pot… I can run around my backyard… it feels good to let all my (whatever word you use to describe his frustation) out… it feels good to be silly for (5) minutes… then, when the timer goes off and I have had my silly time my body feels calmer (describe how he is when he isn’t “all teeth”) and I can (do the calmer activities that he likes and homework, etc)… mom feels this way when she gets home… when mom feels this way she likes to (fill in what you do)… This is mom’s “Silly Time”… Dad feels this way too when he gets home… when dad feels this way he likes to (fill in what dad does)… This is dad’s “Silly Time”… It is okay to have these feelings… but I need to try not to yell at mom (or whatever behavior he engages in) when I have these feelings… That is why I have my Silly Time… It is important for me to know that sometimes I feel ( ) and sometimes I need to be silly. Mom and Dad like when I have “Silly Time” and that I can be calmer afterward and (do my homework, etc.)… “Silly Time” can help me feel better and have fun after a hard day at school.
Let me know what you come up with. I would love to read it!!!
Oh, bless you this is so very helpful. Please forgive me for the short late response, but today was my son’s 6th birthday and I (we!) are wiped out. I’ll be back tomorrow!
Lori
Happy Birthday Tyoma! Ted had his 21st on the 19th and I can say from experience birthdays become much less tiring as the years go on!
I will be posting today another social story I wrote when Ted was 5. Thought it might help with ideas for the coming home story.
Hello!
I am at peace after birthday/vacation and waiting for my son to come home from his first day of school. I want to thank you so much for the suggestions you gave for T’s social story.
Iam using your draft for our won story which I can pdf/jpeg as soon as I figure out how to translate boardmaker into other file types.
You suggestion for a controlled meltdown was completely awesome. He will meltdown, I know it, but by giving him some direction, he won’t end up in his room, biting and hysterical. I can’t stress enough how helpful this advice is.
I am off to put the finishing touches on my story. Thank you for your excellent advice.
Lori
Lori,
I am so glad to have provided an idea that might be of help to you and Tyoma. Often shining a light on something, acknowledging it, rather than hoping it will just magically go away is the way to actually alleviate it. And until it does go away, acknowledgement can make the less-than-desirable moments more tolerable and more respectful. The goal I think is to help Tyoma express his pent up feelings with dignity. So often, it seems, the goal of maintaining the child’s dignity goes unrecognized.
I hope Tyoma’s first day of school went well. I look forward to hearing about his year in your future posts!
Thank you so much for this message. You have made my afternoon!
All my best,
Charlotte
Pingback: Teddy’s Kindergarten Social Story | Life and Ink
Pingback: The Angry Monster In Me Social Story | Life and Ink